A Year Ago

Hmm, third post today! But this one is related to Shimelle's prompt today.  I've read several people's posts and been thinking about my situation this time last year... Thing is, I don't have any photos because it's me that normally takes pictures and, well I couldn't take any last November.

This time last year, life was somewhat difficult.  In the last week of October I had a fall and an injury to my back, which was, for a time, quite disabling.  The whole of my upper back was affected, with my arms, hands and kneck being very painful. 
For the first couple of months I could do very little - especially for the first four or five weeks.  I spent that time sitting on the sofa. I couldn't lie down, so slept sitting up (when I could sleep). I couldn't hold a book or pen, so was unable to read or write.  I couldn't use the computer, or my camera. No sewing, crochet, scrapping, card making (Christmas cards were all bought last year, for the first time in about 10 years!).  I even had trouble eating - couldn't sit at the dining table, so had to eat at a little folding table in front of the sofa. My husband and son had to help me to dress, wash etc and make our meals.  Even cleaning my teeth was difficult - although the electric toothbrush was fab.  I spent a lot of time in bed, though I couldn't sleep there! I couldn't drive for about 6 weeks and my neighbour and friend had to take me to my two-or-three times a week appointments at the osteopath.  I was in pain the whole time, day and night, without any let-up.  Sometimes I was in tears, because it was all just too much.
By Christmas I was getting better. I could sit up at the table, but still not lie flat. I could drive very short distances on a good day (gear stick and reversing were the main problems).  I could do simple cooking and food preparation, but not lift saucepans or baking dishes. I still needed help to load or unload the dishwasher or washing machine and couldn't lift anything heavier than a plate or cup.  My husband dealt with the Christmas meal etc, though I managed to order all our shopping and presents online and wrap things a little at a time.  I managed to help decorate the tree and the house too, so it was still fun for me, even if a bit slow.  Everyone was very kind and helpful.
My friend sent her niece to clean for me and earn pocket money, then she came over herself to give a hand and get the place tidy for Christmas.  Other friends took me places I needed to go. Mum's friends rallied round to help her and take her to any dr's appointments etc.
After Christmas I was still improving. I managed to make a couple of scrapbook layouts, slowly and painstakingly, over several days. I discovered ways to make things easier to accomplish and worked out what I could do without causing myself pain.  I started making books and opened a shop on Etsy.com.  I found I could do book binding and scrapping, as long as I took it slowly. It was good to have something useful to do.
By Springtime I was driving again and we had a new car, with higher up seats, which made getting in and out much easier. I was still stiff and couldn't walk far, or quickly, but at least I could get out of the house and didn't have to sit on the sofa watching tv all day.  We signed up a builder to start our extension and I was able to make cups of tea and walk upstairs to tell the guys it was ready, even though they had to fetch it themselves.
By the time the builders had nearly finished I was carrying their cups upstairs myself (though not down again, as I still needed 2 hands to get downstairs safely). 
In July I managed to help paint our new bedroom, though I had problems with vertigo, and couldn't keep my arms above my head, so D had to do ceilings and tops-of-walls. 
In August, I drove all the way to the Lake District and drove the car up and down the hills on several days during the holiday; then I drove us home again. I had a sore back the following week, but I managed to do it, which was great.
By September I was decorating our old room for J. - except for the ceiling.  I was scrapping regularly and making books and toys. I was stopped by another attack of vertigo, but got tablets from the dr. and was ok again.
In October I drove us to Norfolk for a short holiday and coped with 4 nights in a hard youth hostel bed.  I didn't have back problems at all on holiday, and was only a bit stiff once we got back.

Now it's November and 12 1/2 months have gone by since my injury.  I am not back to full fitness - I suspect it will take much longer than a year, as my nerves and muscles are still quite feeble. I can do most things now, though a busy weekend of wardrobe-building still makes me pretty stiff for several days!  I am a whole lot better and appreciate what I can do so much more than I did when I was fit and well.

That was my last year (in a nutshell and minus many other bits!).  I feel as if it has been a sort-of journey. I started it in pain and feeling frustrated; a year later the pain has mostly gone and I feel positive and encouraged. I am getting fitter and beginning to plan ways to get myself back to "normal" fitness again. I can do stuff like decorating and putting up shelves, as long as I only do a bit at a time.  I can use the computer, make books, scrap and sew, as long as I pace myself. It's all about little and often, rather than marathon sessions. 

I may have suffered pain and unhappiness, especially at first, but I learned a lot along the way. Like how I can cope with something like that; like how wonderful my husband and son are; like how great my friends are when I need them; like finding balance in my life; like saying "no" when I need to take time out; like how lucky I am.

I am not sorry I had my accident.  That's a strange thing to say, but it is true. I have learned so much from this, even though I will probably have some problems from the injury for the rest of my life.  I might have preferred to learn the lessons another way, but obviously this was the way I was supposed to learn.  Sometimes it takes something like a big life-change to teach the important lessons, especially to people like me.  I actually feel lucky, because my injury was only temporary and I'm now mostly better. Some people have much worse injuries or illness and never recover. Some have to suffer pain like I did, but for years, rather than weeks. I had my bad bit, I suffered, but now it's just about over and life is good.


What a long post. And, as Alice said, it has "no pictures or conversations". I wrote it mainly for myself, but I don't mind if someone else reads it, so I won't make it private.  If you've read through this far and are still with me, thanks for reading!

The Project 2009 / The Plan 2010?

I am not one of Life's Planners.  When my boss, years ago, started talking about 5- and 10-year Plans, I kind-of went into a doze.  I had ambitions for my future life, but the furthest ahead that I would/could plan was about a year.  After that, it all went hazy and I began to feel somewhat dizzy...

Well! Today's prompt from Shimelle is about setting goals and journeys.  Funny that - I've been keeping a photo album on my Facebook profile, all about "The Project 2009", which has been the building of a new bedroom and shower room over our kitchen extension and the resulting re-organisation of just about every other room in the house! 

Since I started my blog I have included several references to The Project, some photos of the current "phase" - re-decorate our old room for J and move him into his new bedroom, also a link to my Facebook photo album  (which, by the way, I am not certain works ok, so anyone who can confirm this will earn brownie points!)

Does that mean I'm ahead on this one?  But of course this is not a race or competition... It's just a coincidence that I have a project on the go that takes most of my time.

However, that does make me think of my own goals at the moment and how they relate to - and depend in some degree on - The Project.

I had a bad fall in October 2008, which gave me a lot of problems with my back, kneck and arms/hands. My recovery has taken a year and at first I could do almost nothing for myself, had to rely on help from friends and family, slept sitting up, couldn't drive etc.. It forced me to slow down and take a bit of a look at my life - not that I was ever into "Fast Living" you understand.  I'm one of life's tortoises, rather than one of the hares. 

I had been getting more involved with scrapping and other papercrafts, having been a card-maker for years.  I was unable to do these things for several months, but when I was able to start again, I decided that I wanted to try and make crafts more central to my life, make the most of the skills I have and develop my abilities more. 
I started an online shop, on Etsy.com, which I have been gradually building up, and began to work on scrapping and bookbinding skills. I now have a number of lovely books of all types in my shop, including notebooks, journals, photo albums, mini scrap albums etc. Also I offer a service making customised layouts or mini-books for others, scrapping their memories for them, using their photos and their preferences to make something they can keep for ever.
In addition, I am working on a commission just now, to produce a diary/planner, which is almost finished. I hope the customer will be very pleased with it.
Besides my shop,  I decided that it was all very well having a secret ambition to be on the design team for one of the scrapping mags or websites, but if I really wanted to do it, then I had to start taking some Action! Action doesn't come easily to me, being a quiet sort of person with a bit of a fear of putting myself forward.  I decided to start by learning more about scrapping techniques (and about myself?) - so I signed up to Shimelle's "Learn Something New Every Day" course, which ran throughout September. I had a great time, although it wasn't really well-timed for me, as September was total chaos here. However I did learn stuff and I took the bull by the horns and submitted a layout for a magazine spec.  They liked it! They said they wanted to publish it, would pay me and would I send it in. So I did. It will be published some time in the next few months, though the date is not definite just now. Now I must do it again, and again... Even if it's scary...

So, that's what I have been doing towards my personal goals.  The next phase involves developing all that further and further.  My husband suggested that we should turn the new "spare room" into a work-space for me (he is very kind, though I think he was also motivated by the constant mess on the dining table - see earlier posts and Mess for details!!).  This is keeping me busy. Apart from wanting J to be happy with his new room, I have another reason to spur me on to getting that finished - once he is moved out of his old room, I can move in!!
Just now, I can be seen poring over the Ikea catalogue, crawling about with a tape measure, scratching my head and muttering stuff like "would a glass desk-top make the room look bigger?", or "should I go for that great big Expedit bookcase unit, or a smaller one and wall shelves above drawer units?" and other stuff that, on the face of it, doesn't make much difference to the World At Large, but could make a lot of difference to me in a few weeks' time!

Then I will go on some more Courses. This time I am going to learn more about bookbinding and printmaking. I have found two courses in January. I just have to phone up and book... Must put it on tomorrow's to-do-list. No more prevaricating in the environs of the shrubbery!

So, it looks as if I do have some goals, some of them short-term and others for the longer term.

1) To finish J's new room
2) To set up my workspace
3) To develop and promote my Shop
4) To develop my skills and learn more
5) To get more work published
6) To make and sell more and better books

Sounds like A Plan, as well as a Project!

The First Book I ever sold!